healthtrix

Does a girl in her school years from the ages of 14-18 really start to look at her future and what kind of decisions she need to make to be sure she becomes someone? What is a someone? What do we have to do to become a someone? I literally did not have an idea nor did I care but I always felt like less than a person because I never thought about those things as important. I watched every year go by, freshman grade through to a senior, as my grades in school got worse my priorities got less but most importantly, myself respect was going downhill fast.

That did not feel good at all, in fact it was very sad at times. I would actually cry at times when I was alone but I didn’t want anyone to think I cared about anything. Alcohol and different drugs helped me so I experimented with them for a short time thinking it would help. Drugs like marijuana, speed, cocaine, and prescription pills like sleeping pills and tranquilizers; I didn’t care what they were as long as I could get a hold of something. I was not afraid to try any kind of substance at time went on because in the beginning I would be afraid if I drank too much alcohol that something would happen to me but that didn’t last long.

Once I started to drink and mix with drugs I stopped being sad while I was feeling the effects but the next day I would physically feel sick and try to remember things I had done which made me feel even worse about myself. It would make me feel very embarrassed to hear about what I did that it made me want to crawl in a hole and die. My method of coping with this terrible feeling is to begin drinking again so I could get myself to the point of not feeling sadness again. This was a vicious cycle that continued seven days a week. Eventually, that feeling was the only place I wanted to be.

I floated in that place in my head for years and years but it was a very dark place. My head was the dark place and the reason why I know that is because for the first year of my sober life I finally started to see the light. When I wake up in the morning I saw the light and over time that light would stay in my head and for quite some time I was afraid of it.

I’ve always been afraid of the unknown. The light was the unknown to me because I had never experienced the light lasting for any length of time. It was always complete darkness to me but when I opened my eyes in the morning to me it was still dark. I brought that darkness to my head at a very young age, about age 13 which was two years after I began drinking. That was the beginning of my depression, but I put on a good act to the rest of the world. I was always smiling and pretending things are fine which became exhausting at times because it was always an act I was putting on.

When I got sober the first time I experienced the light was in rehab after being there about three weeks. Many things had happened in those three weeks and they were all life changing. They were unknown feelings to me because they didn’t feel bad, which is what I was used to. Then the light came back the second time a few days later. I had fallen asleep for the first time as soon as I went to bed in rehab one evening, I must have been asleep two hours and I sat up so fast I felt breathless but when I opened my eyes I saw the light, and not just the one in the hall. I saw the light all around my face and the sides of my head and I felt like smiling. I couldn’t believe it, it actually felt good. I laid back down and stayed awake for awhile but all I thought about in my head were all the things I was finally being honest to my self about and to my counselor. Then I realized that if I continued to remain honest and made the right choices that this light was going to stay. I was in control for the first time; finally it was all in my hands.

For me to be able to describe the depression I was in for years tell me that I was never completely numb, as this was the constant goal for myself, to avoid feeling. I was always feeling so much sadness and I hated myself, my life and what I was doing to my family. It had been so long I was numbing myself and living absolutely fearless of what I was putting in my body. I just existed in a day to day life of unhappiness, accidental overdoses, and all this time I was oblivious to what I was doing to my family whom I loved so much. All this doesn’t sound like the actions of a woman who cared about anyone but herself. I did learn as a young child how to block out the world around me because I thought that this is what I needed to do to survive.

This ability to see this new light in my life was exciting but also petrifying at the same time. A lot of change was ahead of me, but I was on the right path to sobriety after rehab. I was aware that tough times were ahead of me, but I really didn’t understand the changes that I was about to face.

Eileen DeClemente was 11 years old when she took her first drink. Alive is her courageous story of an addiction so consuming it nearly killed her and destroyed her family. To anyone who has ever battled an addiction, and to the people who have loved them. This story is for you, Eileen is Alive.

Divorce and the Family

For those who have never been involved in divorce, or for those who have brushed past it but never quite understood the intensity. Divorce is one big tangle that never really unravels. Five years on from a divorce, the parents are still surviving, although remaining bitter. The children are still shell shocked.

As adults we all can handle the tangle, but the children are not mature enough to comprehend the frustration, and what appears at times, to be the ‘lack of love’. This confusion carries on into their early adulthood. There are two particularly common side effects that happen as a consequence of splitting up; one is dyslexia, and the other is wetting the bed.

Although this observation within a marriage breakup sounds harsh for the children, there is no suggestion that a family should stick together for the sake of the children. This option may seem feasible and many have weathered the storm, but a different type of problem is created; a different type of confusion. The children will see a life without the comfort of love and as a consequence could reach adulthood with no expectancy of forming a relationship.

Love is what makes the world go around, without it your children will grow up living a sheltered and unfulfilled life. We cannot bring a child into a family and allow them to see two parents fighting and arguing all of the time.

Financial Issues in Family matters

Finance in separation and divorce is complicated; who owns which debt, who owns which car and who owns which property. Untangling finances is one of the most difficult aspects of ending a long term relationship or marriage. You could find yourself dividing savings, splitting the furniture; and on top of all that paying out maintenance to your other half. Maintenance incidentally can be claimed from either the male or female after the breakup.

According to lawyers it is generally the woman who comes out on top. This is either when an agreement is reached by two legal representatives, or if it necessary, when the couple have needed to go to court.

Often overlooked initially, in the heat of separation, the finances become a big issue. What in theory would be ideal, is that the couple sell everything, pay all outstanding bills, and then equally divide. But along with the theory comes the impracticalities of each parent finding somewhere else to live, the furniture, valuables, bank balances, secret stashes of cash and memorabilia from both childhood and parents.

One amusing but real example was when a separated couple had no legal representative as the adults thought they could sort it out themselves. The male partner had gone back ‘up north’ to his parents and asked if his ex-partner could sell the BMW and send him half the money. She sent him a payment for £5… Rather than sell it for a realistic price, she sold it for £10, got a receipt, then halved the total received and sent it to her ex-partner.

Domestic Violence and Child Abduction

Access to children is another area that often is only resolved by attending court. Both the father and the mother deserve access to see their children, but it can lead to further disagreements. These unsavory moments can include further financial issues, access problems and parental guidance.

One parent may suggest one particular way to deal with a situation and the other parent is deliberately opposite in view. Although unpleasant, both parents use each situation as another option to be bitter and twisted. It is often witnessed that parents use their children as bullets during these periods of access. This will also add to the negativity within the mind of the child.

CONCLUSION

What funded one household will now be supporting two homes, so at least some financial adjustment will be needed, and you may not be that happy with the final result. You will be entering a new phase in your life; the sooner you can adjust the better.

As for the children, keep them out and away from arguments and aggression. Allow them to grow up with love in their house. As far as the children’s ‘rights’ and ‘wrongs’ apply, it is prudent for parents to agree to disagree… Wherever possible if parents could agree with one of the parents’ rules, preferably with the parent that they are living with; rather than insist upon some new rules every time the children change hands.

Mr. P. Booker

Divorce Mediator

Divorce Advice Legal Divorce Help Legal Advice

Run your car on water - at first it sounds like a science fiction or a gas company’s biggest nightmare. However, stories are popping up everywhere, even on Fox News, about this phenomenon that promises to dramatically reduce your gas usage and, as a result, to save you hundreds of dollars a month. Before you decide whether you want to attempt converting your car so it can run on water, you may want to learn a little bit more about the process.

How Does a Car Run on Water?

First, you need to understand that your car won’t run solely on water. What you’re actually going to create is known as a water hybrid. If you remember high school chemistry, you’ll probably recall that water consists of two molecules: hydrogen and oxygen. A process known as electrolysis is used on the water so the hydrogen and oxygen can be used to run the car. Water vapor is the only waste product and that is emitted from the car into the atmosphere.

Is the Process Dangerous?

The answer is no. Of course, you don’t want to ignite the hydrogen or anything like that but really the process is no more dangerous than driving around with gasoline in your tank. Some experts believe using water can actually make your car safer because you won’t be carrying around as much volatile gasoline in your car. Think of it this way: you can get burned from boiling water but when gasoline ignites you get plenty more than a burn.

Does the Process Really Save Money?

Yes but how much you save depends on the type of vehicle you have. Remember you’ll still need to use gasoline in your vehicle because the combustion in the engine is what powers the rest of the water hybrid process. You just won’t need to use as much gas. The larger your vehicle the more gas you’re still going to need. If you already drive a fuel efficient car or a four cylinder vehicle, then you’ll see a more dramatic reduction than if you’re driving an SUV or mammoth truck. That’s not to say you won’t save money - you still will but you’ll need to use more gas in comparison to fuel the process. You might also save money in other ways though. Water burns cooler than gasoline so your engine will end up lasting longer and undergoing less damage over time. That means you’ll save money on repairs.

How Can I Make my Car Run on Water?

First, you’ll need a conversion guide. These guides can be purchased online. Videos are also available on the Internet that will walk you through the steps. If you or someone you know is comfortable with basic car maintenance, then completing the conversion should be no problem. Second, you’ll need to purchase some equipment. The materials required will probably cost you less than filling up your tank at current gas prices. You can find them at most auto part stores on- or off-line. Overall, the conversion process is simple and provides numerous benefits. The best part is that it’s completely reversible so if you’re unhappy with the results you don’t have to live with the change until you buy a different car.

Download Run Your Car On Water Step By Step Installation Guide Today!

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Read my another popular article How To Build A Water Powered Car Motor? for more information.

Travelers are advised that travel insurance they purchase may not cover any injuries or accidents that have been caused by alcohol related activities such as driving while under influence and other such accidents. British travelers love beer and they drink a lot of it, even on some seemingly benign activities which could have them driving or traveling under the influence. The rise of incidents of such accidents have risen due to the fact that the UK public are now going more frequently on trips abroad and locally as opposed to the trends a few years back. So stay off the booze and keep safe, the life you may save might just be your own.

This is where most of the will cover and will not cover discussions are located and as we have stated, anything that is on your policy should be reviewed with great caution. Like all insurance policies, they vary from provider to provider and so does the amounts they entail. One package from a provider may have different exclusions ands inclusions as they are as different as the places they are offered. Most will have a clause that indicates “financial default” which means they are free of liability if and when they declare bankruptcy. These along with some other seemingly interesting clauses, such as non-coverage if you fail to declare going or engaging in hazardous activities (skiing, cross-country, surfing and other sports on land and in the water which they may deem to be hazardous) may deem your travel insurance void and non-applicable. So do read the fine print and understand them before signing anything so you get to enjoy your vacation, even if it all doesn’t go as planned.

The travel insurance industry is delighted to announce that the amount of British travelers has increased a lot as more and more people prefer to go on short vacations abroad. Profits are marginal due to competition which is good for travelers for they get to pay competitive prices from the myriad of providers who offer the service. The rising expatriate market is fueling industry’s growth, which now prefers to take several short breaks fro their hectic lives as opposed to yearly ones. This is also due tot he many connections brought about by businesses who have Brit’s associated with people from all over the world. On business trips or whatever form of travel they engage in, it gives them a taste of the luxury and beauty of foreign lands. The industry hopes the surge maintains its growth as the government places checks and balances in place to regulate the industry due to more cases of disputes when claims are filed.

There are certain travel agents who would indeed try to sneak in travel insurance with the costs of your trip or holiday should you be purchasing a bundled package. The ploy has you given the offer for the trip (with insurance included in the small print) and then they themselves asking you for another set of travel insurance policies to cover all the people who are traveling. If you are in quite of a hurry, you might miss the double charges and find out only when you get back home. Such incidents should be reported promptly to the nearest insurance regulatory body for action to be taken to avoid the continuance of such dastardly acts.

Jon Caldwell is a professional content manager. Much of his articles can be found at http://basictravelinsurance.net

Wedding season is upon us, and that means a record number of photographs will be snapped in the coming weeks and months.

Of course, most brides have figured out who their photographer will be – whether it’s a professional or a talented family member or friend. If you’re a shutterbug and plan on taking pictures at the wedding, that doesn’t mean you can’t get in on the fun!

After all, a wedding is a big day for the invited guests too. So whether you’re a favorite aunt, a close cousin, or a life long friend, here are three tips for taking wedding photos you’ll be proud to share with the bride and groom, and everyone else for that matter!

Tip #1. Be discreet, but don’t be afraid to get the shot. Of course, a wedding is for the bride and groom, and you don’t want to do anything to call attention to yourself. So during the ceremony, it would be best if you kept your camera in the bag. Leave the tender ceremonial photos to the person the bride has designated as her photographer. Unless, of course, she has sought you out prior and specifically asked you to take photos. And no, it’s not OK for you to ask her if you can take photos of the “You may kiss the bride” moment.

Of course, taking photos before the ceremony begins is perfectly acceptable. Just be careful not to get in the way of the professional photographer or the wedding party. And after the ceremony, everyone lightens up quite a bit, so as long as you’re being polite and discreet, you shouldn’t have any problem getting great photos.

Tip #2. Look for photos in the crowd. The professional photographer will have the bride and groom covered. If fact, aside from a couple quick shots, you may not even want to take their picture, as they will both likely be very nervous. The rest of the wedding party and the other invited guests are another story, however.

Oftentimes the bridesmaids and groomsmen are overlooked once the formal wedding photos are taken. Try to get both casual and posed pictures of people in the wedding party. Again, you’ll need to be discreet as they do have a formal function and you don’t want to interfere. But if you can get a candid picture of a bridesmaid holding a young ring bearer, that may just become one of the most memorable shots of the day.

What’s more, the professional photographer won’t know all the guests. So you can take the opportunity to get candid and posed shots of guests you know are important to the bride and groom. Maybe it’s an old friend from high school, or a cousin from out of town. The bride and groom will certainly appreciate your thoughtfulness if you get pictures the professional photographer is likely to miss.

Tip #3. Have a telephoto lens handy, or use your zoom. If you are fortunate enough to have a Single Lens Reflex camera and multiple lenses, then you will want to rely primarily on a lens with multiple focal lengths – a 70 mm to 200 mm works best. This way, you can get both close in shots and shots from further away. Also, have your standard 50 mm handy for some of the posed shots you are sure to take.

If you have a simple point and shoot camera, that’s OK too. Simply rely on your zoom feature when you’re trying to get a candid shot. You can also use the zoom as a cropping tool as you are framing your picture, zooming in on your subject and eliminating unwanted backgrounds.

Just by following these three simple tips, you’re sure to get a lot of really great photos that you’ll be happy and proud to share with the bride and groom, and everyone else at the wedding.

You’ll become more than a bystander and observer – you’ll become someone who helps the happy couple remember all the special moments from the most special day of their lives!

Sara Charles writes for a variety of clients, including Hoorray, a photo sharing website that offers a free online photo album to new members and is the easiest place to create a digital photo album, calendar, and more.

Ric Edelman is an author and runs one of the largest independent investment and financial planning firms in America. Ric Edelman has his own Radio Show syndicated by ABC Radio Networks. He has a nationally syndicated newspaper column called “The Truth about Money”. He has authored several books, most recently “The Truth about Money” 2003, and “The Lies about Money” 2007. He is also a contributor to the “Oprah Winfrey Show”.

There is no doubting Ric Edelman’s credentials he has an impressive resume. He has sold millions of books and his financial planning firm manages close to $2 billion. The problem here is that it appears to me, Ric Edelman’s advice is solely designed to serve the interests of his financial planning firm and not the individual investor.

This is evidenced by his flip flop from supporting the managed mutual fund industry in his audio book “No-Nonsense System for Building Wealth”. Then in his latest book “The Lies about Money” Ric Edelman preaches about all the problems with the mutual fund industry. You see his firm moved from actively managed mutual funds to institutional funds. The mutual fund industry didn’t just start having these problems. These problems were present when he was recommending them and his firm stood to benefit from discouraging his readers from investments in mutual funds.

Ric Edelman has not been as successful as he is without providing quality advice and service. He has many good points and his strategies are sound for the most part. However there are some things I completely disagree with him on. In particular his insistence on “Buy and Hold”. Advisors like Edelman call trend following gambling and see no value in it. Unfortunately they seem to believe that the average investor is not smart enough to make their own decisions. With the advances in technology, computers and the internet, average investors can get access to the same information as the “big boys” and we can generate returns that are just as good and usually better when we spend a little time researching on our own. There are many programs, systems, newsletters and other services that can help investors make good sound investments without paying some multi-billion dollar firm to manage it for them.

Edelman makes some great points about the financial press that can easily apply to himself: “Many in the financial world have their own agendas. They aren’t necessarily trying to give you financial information. What they are trying to do is generate profitability for themselves.”

All that being said Edelman does provide some good sound advice you just need to look at it through the filter of knowing where he is coming from. Even Ric Edelman knows why he was writing his books, at one point he asks: “has this entire program been nothing but a sales pitch?”

I’m all about trying to give the most accurate information. If you beleive anything in this article is incorrect or if you just want to leave a comment, please contact me.

I’m Dan Cunningham. I am an investor and entrepreneur. Feel free to contact me with any questions or leave a comment. Rabbit’s Report on Internet Wealth dan@rabbitsreport.com

When I decided to write a book sharing my life with the rest of the world I really didn’t know what extreme this decision would take me in. I have been experiencing more emotional changes than I would imagine.

My story would start out to be about my addiction to alcohol and drugs from the age of eleven to the age of thirty five. During that time period I grew from a child to an adult. I got married at twenty two years old and four years later I had two daughters. They were the victims in this story when I first started writing but it didn’t take me long to realize they weren’t the only victims.

Because the girls were nine and seven when I hit bottom they had already spent the youngest years of their life worrying and taking care of each other and me. When I began to sober up I realized there was a lot more to living a sober life than to just quit using. I was eleven years old when I picked up for the first time; my brain had basically stopped maturing so when my body was free of alcohol and drugs I had to take a deep and long look at myself. What I saw I didn’t like and I basically used my addiction as a way of pushing away all of the painful things that were happening for twenty five years. At this point I felt numb.

In rehab I woke up after a long painful detox and I was no longer numb. There was so much going on in my mind, body and soul that at first I truly believed I could not do this and the first time I realized that my counselor had something to say. He said, “You are right where you’re supposed to be; now you just took the first step in something you have not practiced in years, honesty.” I didn’t have a clue to what he was saying, but I would soon start to learn and I have continued to learn for the last twenty years.

Honesty is always been pretty black and white for me. What I am doing or saying is either true or not true, I still believe that but when it comes to getting honest with me it becomes a little more complicated.

As I spent three years painfully writing the story of where I came from, how I grew up, and my addiction that started as an adolescent, it became very painful for me. Everything I believed I had dealt with in my life since getting sober I obviously wasn’t done with. I started sabotaging my own project by not meeting deadlines. Fortunately I had a wonderful publicist, coach, marketer - actually she’s a lot of everything and she stuck with me through the whole book. She lovingly called me on my procrastination, excuses and the number one problem, honesty.

Everything I had learned about being responsible for myself and being honest with myself since the beginning of my sobriety was the key to keeping me straight but here I was starting to justify and manipulate again after twenty years. I knew the path that would take me on, and that was back to using. Here I was with one goal after having to retire from a job I had loved for eighteen years because of the early onset of Alzheimer’s, and that goal was to share my story openly and honestly, which brought me to a very vulnerable place. I wanted to help one person, I wanted people to know there was help out there and I would do anything I could.

That was my goal and with the support of my loving family, my coach and my editor every secret I had ever had, every bad choice I had made in my life was there in black and white. The first week my book was out in print I had reached my goal. A beautiful girl I had never met before bought and read my book and came to me crying and thanking me because my story was helping her deal with someone in her life living in an addiction. I was so happy for them and felt so good about myself but something was wrong and it was surfacing. In the past two months I have experienced a huge personal and painful journey of self honesty and hopefully my quality of life as it is today will change for the better because I got honest with myself.

Four years ago when I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s I was also diagnosed with severe osteoporosis and suffered through a pattern of fractures in my back and a knee injury that has been chronic. Because of my past history with drugs I was told I needed to go to a pain management clinic to take care of the chronic pain, which I did and knowingly and consciously. I went on medications that I knew in my head and heart that I shouldn’t be on. I justified it and started taking them and of course during the emotional times I struggled through writing my book I see now that I was numbing myself. There have been physical changes occurring lately and my family once again is very scared that the Alzheimer’s is progressing, which it is, but since opening myself and dealing with everyday struggles I can do nothing but get honest. I truly believe some of the medications I am on are affecting my everyday life. I believe I am addicted.

Eileen DeClemente was 11 years old when she took her first drink. Alive is her courageous story of an addiction so consuming it nearly killed her and destroyed her family. To anyone who has ever battled an addiction, and to the people who have loved them. This story is for you, Eileen is Alive.

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and other 12-step groups (e.g., Narcotics Anonymous, Cocaine Anonymous, Marijuana Anonymous, etc.) suggest that in order to recover from addiction you must accept that you are powerless to recover on your own. Only with inspiration from a higher power, recognition of your own character defects, and fellowship in the group, among other steps, will you be successful. If this perspective makes sense to you, then 12-step groups may be just what you need. But the higher power concept is not acceptable to many, and it probably isn’t the foundation of the limited success AA actually achieves.

AA was established in 1935. Other groups have followed, with several hundred types of 12-step groups now in existence. These groups have been attended by millions around the world. Many participants report that their success is directly attributable to participation in the groups and acceptance of a higher power in their lives.

An alternative perspective is that many who have been helped by 12-step groups have benefited primarily from what might be called “social support,” as well as some of the useful behavioral guidance of 12-step groups, rather than from a deep acceptance of the 12-step philosophy. Of course, there may be are a few individuals who will recover only by following AA’s philosophy precisely and entirely. Most individuals, however, might benefit from a variety of approaches to change. Unfortunately, there are also individuals who may not significantly benefit from any.

If social support is the primary factor in AA, how does it work? The social support provided by 12-step groups is similar to the support provided by any discussion group of individuals with common problems. In such a group participants can describe their own experiences and express their feelings about them, identify individuals (models) to emulate, realize that however much they have struggled others may have struggled even more, discover alternative solutions for problems they have faced, learn about problems that might occur in the future and ways to solve them, experience the care and concern of others, and momentarily transcend their own problems by caring for others. Regardless of the underlying philosophy of such a group, or even in the absence of a philosophy, these experiences are likely to be therapeutic for most individuals.

In physical health care it is recognized that when patients are well connected to others and speak with them regularly, whether it is a support group, friends, family or others, health, well-being and longevity are better. Love is the best drug. Evidence is now emerging that 12-step based treatment may be as helpful as proven treatments. What is probably being observed, in most cases, is the power of social support, not the power of the 12 steps.

AA’s program of recovery is based on the acceptance of powerlessness. However, for many who attend 12-step groups the result of group participation is, ironically, a sense of empowerment derived from the processes of social support. Consequently, even if you are committed to an alternative perspective on recovery, you might find 12-step meetings helpful. Some of my own clients have attended them regularly. If alternatives are not available in your locality, 12-step groups might be a sensible option for you. They do not conduct a “belief test” at the door. If you are quiet about your points of disagreement you might benefit from the social support as well as other aspects of the meeting. You might even leave feeling empowered!

Addiction treatment San Diego.

A top headline news story coming out of Idaho this past week involves the death of Idaho resident Sue Newby. Her husband, Mark Newby committed suicide when the police were closing in on him while investigating the suspicious death. Ada County Sheriff’s deputies had reason to believe the death was not, as reported by Mr. Newby, an accident, in part due to evidence of an affair and a motive of financial gain.

The Idaho Statesman (www.idahostatesman.com) reported:

‘On April 2, Sue Newby told a friend she planned to take a horse ride with her husband and confront him about a suspected affair.

On April 4, she was dead in the bottom of Rocky Canyon north of Eagle. What happened that day may never be known. Mark D. Newby, 46, killed himself with a gunshot to his head late Wednesday, say Ada County sheriff’s deputies who discovered the body when they arrived at his home with a search warrant as they investigated Sue Newby’s death.’

Friends and family of Sue were suspicious of the death from the onset, as were several horse enthusiasts who said the details of the “accident” didn’t make sense. They rightfully encouraged law enforcement to dig deeply into this case, and to the credit of the investigators, they did. They quickly developed sufficient probable cause to obtain a search warrant for Newby’s residence.

The point of my writing though is not to dwell on the circumstances which led to Sue Newby’s tragic death, but to offer some occasionally overlooked advice for women in potentially vulnerable situations.

In this case Sue Newby told friends she planned to confront her husband about a suspected affair while the two of them were horseback riding in a remote area; this was not a good idea. She should have confronted him at home or in a public place with just enough privacy for a conversation, not an otherwise unattended act of violence or murder.

In my 21 years with the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department, I had the misfortune to see worse-case endings similar to this in many cases. The common denominator was often that the victim placed herself in a vulnerable situation. Linda Sobek was a model who was murdered in 1995 by photographer Charles Rathbun at a remote photo shoot. Rathbun had attempted to rape Sobek before murdering her and reporting her death as an accident. This is one of the more notorious cases of which I am reminded, but there are many others that come to mind. And although these two cases are markedly different, there remains a common denominator of vulnerability.

What should be known to all women, young ladies and even boys is that predators come in all sizes, shapes, social-economical and ethnic classes; they represent all professions (yes, even law enforcement), religious sectors (remember the Catholic priest scandals?) and recreational groups (scouting groups, team sports, etc.). Their prey most often have the common denominator of vulnerability in a variety of ways too many and complex to discuss in this article. The real point is this: Since predators fit so neatly into society before and often after striking out at their prey, it is imperative that we do not allow ourselves or our loved ones to become prey.

The following are a few suggestions in protecting ones self:

If your daughter or girlfriend (or you) is planning to meet someone with whom she has established an internet relationship, a very common occurrence these days, encourage (actually, insist!) her to meet him in a safe and neutral environment. (I say neutral because it is equally important she not reveal her residence to someone she knows nothing about.) Have an exit strategy in the event things do not go as planned, and always tell someone trustworthy where you plan to be and when you expect to be finished.

If your son, daughter, friend or sibling is involved in sports or other recreational activities, don’t assume the “adult” in the situation is trustworthy. Never allow him or her to be alone with the “coach” and remember there is safety in numbers.

If you or your best friend is having trouble in a current relationship and plan to break it off or confront the significant other, do so in the manner previously described for meeting someone for the first time. Also, as in that case, have a simple yet effective exit strategy and be prepared to implement it at the first sign of trouble.

Finally, seriously consider having background checks of strangers you are considering dating or allowing access to your children or loved ones. Remember, these are very different times than generations past when everyone in a community knew everyone else, and seldom did their social circles extend beyond that community. Technology has shrunk our world, and for all of its good, there are plenty of underlying evils.

Danny R. Smith, founder and owner of DRS Investigations, LLC in Idaho, is a former homicide detective from the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department. For more information about the author, please visit his web site: DRS Investigations, LLC

Individuals on a spiritual path eventually hear about the virtues of renunciation and non-attachment. They are told or they read that desire causes all pain and suffering. And of course, an attachment to your desires places you on an endless cycle of alternating pleasure and pain. The only solution is to renounce the flesh and live the contemplative life of the ascetic.

It is apparent that most people don’t adopt a life of asceticism. However many do renounce the many pleasures of the flesh believing they will find the spiritual path of ecstasy and salvation. They think they have conquered the erring ways of the body only to discover that life is less than it could be. They finally justify their misery by rationalizing that suffering is the spiritual path–not realizing that they are now attached to their suffering.

Sadly these people are living in a world of illusion. They have traded one set of illusions for another set. They don’t realize they have sacrificed a higher value for a lower one. They have traded what little happiness they had for a life of sacrifice and self-denial.

Why would they do this? Why would someone accept emotional pain and suffering and believe this is the spiritual path? The reason is: They totally misunderstand renunciation and non-attachment.

Misunderstanding Renunciation and Non-Attachment

In reality what most people are attached to are the negative emotions. Their negative emotions result in neurotic behavior. They become attached to people and things that cause them much grief and misery. They live soap opera lives.

You can see it in unhappy marriages, abusive relationships, broken friendships, the work environment, the economic situation, terrorism, wars, etc. I could go on and on about negative emotions and the neurotic and even psychotic behavior that result in pain and suffering.

It’s no wonder people want to renounce the insanity they see in every day life. Unfortunately they have cause and effect reversed. It isn’t the world they should renounce—but the negative emotions that result in neurotic and psychotic behavior.

They don’t realize that when they renounce the external world they are also renouncing the pleasure and ecstasy it has to offer. Sadly, they end up attached to their pain and suffering.

Spiritual Enlightenment

We’re going to cut to the core of the issue. The spiritually enlightened do not indulge in pain and suffering. They have transcended all misery. They don’t renounce the pleasures and ecstasies of life. In fact they enjoy them to the max. They have totally integrated the pleasures of the mind, body and spirit. To some they might seem quite worldly.

Here is how the spiritually enlightened live.

1.The only thing they renounce is the negative emotions and the neurotic and psychotic behavior that results from them.

2.They enjoy all life has to offer to the fullest. They sip the finest wines or spirits, have the most ecstatic sexual relationships, enjoy value for value friendships, relish the taste of good food, bathe in the delights of nature, dance, cry and soar to their favorite music, etc. They enjoy all their activities with passion and delight. They shun the anti-life philosophy of altruism. They embrace personal liberty and freedom. They live The Libertarian Way.

3.They don’t allow attachments to restrict their personal liberty and freedom. If they suffer a loss they may weep tears of sadness and mourn. However you won’t catch an enlightened one suffering years after the fact. They always return to joyous living. Their existence is too important to wallow in pain and suffering. Even though their life is their highest value–they’re not neurotically attached to it since they know they are eternal beings.

4.They won’t overindulge in food, drink or other vices. They enjoy all the good things in life but they never go beyond the point of diminishing returns. They are too enlightened to become attached to destructive behaviors.

Your solution:

Life is meant to be pleasure and ecstasy—not pain and suffering. If an activity supplies you with pleasure relish it with love and passion. Go for the gusto. Enjoy Libertarian Pleasures.

If negative emotions are plaguing you. If you suffer from guilts and fears. If external events make you feel anger or despair. Don’t renounce the world and all of its pleasures. There’s a better way to deal with all the pain, suffering and frustrations.

Begin a daily meditation program. In your meditations you want to release all the negativity that’s interfering with your enjoyment of life. You expand your power of reason and reach the higher states of awareness. You experience euphoria. Eventually the euphoria from your meditations will start to permeate all of your activities.

It really is quite simple. Release the negativity that’s holding you back. Experience all the pleasures and ecstasies life has to offer. Practice the philosophy of rational selfishness. The Libertarian Way will be yours. In fact you may become a master of life.

Robert A. Meyer has been investigating and studying economics, philosophy, psychology and metaphysics for 30 years. He realizes there are basic principles of Human Action that will help you become successful. His knowledge that life is to be lived on a physical, emotional, mental and spiritual level allowed him to discover “The Libertarian Way.” He experiences its many pleasures and ecstasies on a daily basis. http://libertarianway.com/